If you have a child in year 13, like we do, there’s a good chance they had their last official day of school on Friday. It has been a big week, with a fitting celebration on Friday evening. It’s also been quite emotional.

There are still exams to come, and a graduation dinner – but 13 years of bells, uniforms, timetables, organised sport, study, exams, dramas, and discovering your identity as you move from tween to teen has come to an end.

It has been a lot. Just completing high school is an accomplishment in itself.

So regardless of whether you loved or hated the experience it’s worth taking a moment to celebrate and reflect.

13 years and 3 schools, it’s been a rollercoaster ride filled with highs and lows, regrets and achievements, lessons learnt – both in the classroom  and socially, and for many it’s one a toughest social experiments they’ll experience.

So congratulations to all the school leavers out there - you have survived the zoo.

And now, as life changes for one member of our family, it changes for us all. We all feel a bit differently about it in our house. My son has made the most of celebrating the comradery of his year group, and the shenanigans of the final week of school, but admits he’s emotional about it all coming to an end. His father is contemplating how much he will miss his son when he moves to a different city for university.

Like many younger siblings -  his young sister is simply looking forward to having a bathroom to herself.

As for me? Well, I’m a mixed bag of nostalgia, relief and excitement. Unlike his father, I think I struggled with the loss of my gorgeous young boy when puberty hit. You know, that stage when they go from cuddly, overly enthusiastic and communicative to grunters who can’t remember why they crossed the room.

As the parent dealing with the more day to day aspects of our kids’ lives, I grieved for the loss of my little boy. I knew he’d be back, and he is – he’s a gorgeous, smart, kind and happy young man, but I wonder whether that grief mothers experience when their sons are around 13 is an opportunity for them to slowly start preparing to let their boys go at 18.

When he leaves I will miss him terribly. But I know he’s ready to go, and needs to go, and I believe our mother-son relationship will go to a new level when he does.

So yes, I am sentimental about the end of school. I’m emotional seeing the emotion between mates, the strength of the friendships he’s made, and the realisation many are heading off in different directions next year. But I am also hugely excited for him to explore his new-found freedom and find what his future holds.

To keep the emotions in check, this week I drew on Celia Lashlie, author of He'll Be Ok: Growing Gorgeous Boys Into Good Men. She had a ‘bridge of adolescence’ concept. She believed mothers should walk on to the bridge, let their son's hand go, sit on the side and enjoy watching him, occasionally engaging in what is going on if help is needed.

As hard as that’s going to be – that’s what I am going to try and do. 

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